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Discover the beginnings of Wedding Rituals.  Weddings are a cause for great celebration.  Families come together to rejoice the union of two people who have fallen in love.  The two individuals enter into a commitment and begin a journey together.  Steeped in all this joy are numerous wedding rituals.  Where these originate from is most of the time anybody’s guess.  Not everyone follows these traditions and not all traditions are practiced.  With changing times, it’s almost astounding to see any of these matrimonial customs be of any prevalence in the event.

White Wedding Rituals and a Blushing Bride

It’s not a shocker to find one practice on the list.  The wearing of the white wedding dress.  Today’s rituals debate how frequently it is being practiced.  Surely, those brides walking down the aisle for the second or more times will raise an eyebrow or two.  Yet, industry sales show white is still going strong.

Originally, before the mid-1800s, brides wore red. They didn’t start wearing white until around 1840 when Queen Victoria was married to Prince Albert. Victoria asserted her uniqueness and opted for a white, lacy dress.  White represented wealth during that era.  Eventually, the perception of white moved from a representation of wealth to a position of purity.   Hence, the virgin bride is a symbol of purity and the tradition of wearing white began.  Southern Living, a magazine publication, has a great review of the most admired classic white gown presentations. To find your own lovely white gown, or other colors as you choose, visit this resource Wedding Attire for the Bride, Groom and Party from my Wedding Resources Page.

You have heard the phrase, “a blushing bride”.  Could it be this is tied to the idea of purity and a virgin bride?   It doesn’t appear to have any support for this idea, rather the blushing bride was considered a superstitious bride.

Wedding Rituals and Phrases

It’s almost worthy to entertain that out of this superstitious bride idea that “something old, new, borrowed and blue” was its result.  In the 19^th century (approximately 1837-1901, the Victorian era), these items were deemed as a way to bring good fortune to the bride.  Each item represented an aspect of the bride’s life.

Family was honored by wearing something old.  Old from her heritage.  Something new is the send off for her new journey starting her own family.  Borrowing from another happily married couple was an omen for a good marriage.  Something blue was a reference to an old saying “true blue” which stood for loyalty in a relationship.  Loyalty was paired with faithfulness when represented by something blue for a bride.

A little-known fact is there was one more item representing good luck for the bride.  That was a sixpence.  A sixpence, often called a tanner or sixpenny, was a silver coin currency first minted in 1551 until 1947.  Silver was replaced cupronickel.  Cupronickel is an alloy of copper with nickel and iron and manganese.  Although it is a copper, the other elements still left the coin with a silver appearance.  The sixpence was finally removed from circulation in 1980.  Its value was worth a half a schilling, approximately slightly more than a quarter of a pound.  The bride was supposed to wear it in her shoe.

Wedding Rituals to Protect the Bride

The Veil

The Bridal Bouquet

However, the beauty of the bride, be it inner beauty or outward beauty (or both – beauty is in the eye of the beholder), the bride is ALWAYS beautiful on her special day.  And her bouquet is also quite beautiful.  But the original bouquets in Ancient Greece were not flowers at all.  In fact, herbs and spices were bundled together.  They were still as aromatic as any floral arrangement.  But they offered magical powers, similarly to the veil.  The bouquet was less an adornment for the bride as it was for protection against evil spirits.

The Bridesmaids

Protection for the bride didn’t end with the veil and the bouquet.  Initially, the bridesmaids were part of that strategy for protection.  The bridesmaids would dress in similar style to the bride to confuse evil spirits.  Additionally, they would surround the bride and walk with to meet the groom.  Should anyone attack the bride, the bridesmaids were to fight off the assailant.  I would bet a bridesmaid or two today might be more willing to fight off an attacker than wear some of the crazy bridesmaid dresses of the 1980’s and 1990’s.  Thankfully, today brides can find great bridesmaid fashions to work for the whole bridal party!

Wedding Rituals and Fathers

The Best Man

Now, who would ever attack the bride on her way to get married?  Naturally, the evil spirits were of concern.  But another concern was how the groom and the bride’s father got along.  Especially with arranged marriages, when the father did not approve of the groom he would attempt to whisk her away before the wedding.  Likewise, the groom would send a person on his behalf to kidnap the bride.  Have you figured this one out yet?  Right!  It’s the best man.  It was the person who was best able to kidnap the bride, run and hide her out until the groom could join them.

The Exchange of Property

Meanwhile, the father would await his daughter’s arrival along with her bridesmaids to the wedding.  With the arranged marriages, the father would walk the bride down the aisle to represent his releasing ownership.  Daughters were considered property.  Property that could offer leverage for the father.  He could make exchanges of property.  For example, his daughter exchanged for cattle or carts or fine fabrics.  Some fathers offered their daughters to marriage to settle a debt.  Yet, a father’s ideal circumstance was to marry his daughter into a wealthy family.  By doing so, the father also gained respect and status.

A Walk Down the Aisle

Fortunately, the ritual of the father walking the bride down the aisle has transformed.  It has been such a transformation that now it is considered a walk of honor.  It represents the close bond between father and daughter and the love he has for his little girl.  This walk is his statement to tell his daughter and the world he approves of the man suitor and he blesses this union.

The First Look

Back to the origin of wedding rituals also involving the father was the concept of the first look of the bride being as she walked down the aisle, then lifted the veil.  A father could boast of his daughter’s beauty with such exaggeration in order to enhance his benefit of the arranged marriage.  The fear was if the groom saw the bride prior to the nuptials, then he could refuse the bride.

The Wedding Ring

 Another passing of the baton from father to groom was symbolized by the groom placing a wedding band on the left hand of the bride.  The band symbolized the woman was now the property of the groom, no longer belonging to the father.  It was once thought a vein in the fourth finger of the left hand led straight to the heart.  The hopes an arranged marriage could lead to a loving marriage.  But only the wife wore a wedding band.

The First Kiss

Along with the first look being a wedding tradition, so is the first kiss.  The first kiss was initiated as a blessing and came from the priest.  Of course, the priest did not kiss the bride.  Rather, the priest gave a holy “kiss of peace” to the groom.  The groom in turn would bestow the kiss upon the bride.  Full circle of blessings for the marriage.  As a result, the phrase every bride and groom are waiting to hear; “You may now kiss the bride”.

Throwing the Bouquet and Garter

So far, the origins of many wedding day rituals have not been shocking.  But wait until you hear this one! The story behind the tossing of the Bridal Bouquet and the Garter will make you step back a bit.  Heck, I think I blushed!  It is said the original intention for throwing the bouquet and garter were to distract guests from the bride and groom.  The reason…so the newlywed couple could consummate the marriage immediately following the vows.  There was no waiting for the honeymoon.  Tossing the garter was considered proof the groom had conquered the end of the bride’s virginity.

The Wedding Cake

Eventually, the tradition transitioned from a piece of bread crumbled over the head to a wedding cake.  But with it came a tradition of the bride pushing cake through her ring into small portions.  These were given to guests as good luck. 

Finally, today, we keep it simple, the bride and groom feed each other a bite of cake.  Many do take the daring extra step to then smear the rest of the piece into their new spouse’s face.  As for the guests, they are served a whole slice of cake.  But you never hear about the cake bestowing good luck upon the wedding attendants.

Saving Cake

There is added custom to the cake.  The saving of the top tier.  According to the custom, the newlyweds are to save the top tier in the freezer for one year.  On their anniversary, the couple can share the cake together as a celebration of their first wedding anniversary.  But traditional folklore would also have us believe many a bride will have conceived a child by the first anniversary.  The cake, therefore, was to also celebrate the beginning of their family.

The Dance

The First Dance

Not all wedding receptions have dance floors for their post marriage ceremony activities.  But those that do arrange for a dance floor and music usually celebrate the union with a first dance of the newlyweds.  The dance can be as simple as holding one another close and swaying to a special song.  Others will spend weeks taking dance classes to prepare a dance routine.  Then, some couples create a unique display of dance moves they have combined with a custom-made music track.  These catch all the wedding guests by surprise and results in sheer delight!

The Father Daughter Dance

The Father Daughter dance at one time was the first dance at the reception.  This is a newer tradition compared to others.  It was that final extension of the father giving away his daughter in marriage.  Now, it is the second dance at most receptions with a dance floor.  The bride carefully selects a song to dedicate to her dad.  This is a special moment that can bring tears to everyone.  Although, some father daughter dances are quite creative and start slow and sweet then end up in a high kicking, booty wiggling fun dance.

Throwing Rice to Blowing Bubbles

Customs evolve throughout the years as we can tell by learning the origins of many of these rituals already mentioned.  However, the custom may change in its execution but maintain the basic purpose and intention. 

One of the most significantly changed traditions of recent decades has been the throwing of rice to the blowing of bubbles.  The intent is to rejoice in happiness for the bride and groom and wish them good fortune, prosperity, and fertility.

While it began with rice, there were unfortunate hazards to the environment.  Primarily, the small grains of rice were harmful to birds.  Bubbles are an easy and inexpensive replacement.  The softness of bubbles doesn’t create injury and because they dissipate, there is no aftermath for the environment or any animals.

Crossing the Threshold

Second to last, an explanation for the tradition of carrying the bride across the threshold.  As with most of the wedding rituals, this one dates back to times when evil spirits were thought to be prevalent.  Newlyweds were thought to be very susceptible to the shenanigans of evil spirits.  Particularly the bride as she stepped onto the floor of her new home.

See it was dishonorable for the bride to leave her father’s home with enthusiasm.  Evil spirits could follow her into her new home.  But if the groom carried her over the threshold, then the bride was protected from the evil spirits and her father’s honor was preserved.

While consummation of the marriage was previously mentioned with regards to the traditions of the throwing of the bouquet and garter, it was a ritual that also evolved.  Eventually, this act was saved for private moments usually with the bride being taken to her new home.  Speculation would have us consider the carrying of the bride across the threshold was also a way to mask the bride’s eagerness to consummate the marriage.  Thus, maintaining her modesty.

The Honeymoon

Honeymoon Hideaway

Finally, the last of the wedding rituals to review is the origin of the honeymoon.  This is an extension of other traditions.  Refer back to the beginnings of the bridesmaids and best man and the arranged marriages where often the father was against the union.  The groom using the best man to kidnap his bride and then hide her until he could join them.  Well, once he reunited with his best man relieving him of his duties, the groom remained in hiding with his bride.  This period of hiding would last approximately 30 days.

The Wedding Night

Today, the honeymoon has semi-morphed into another tradition, the wedding night. Typically, the bride does not go to her new home following the wedding.  In fact, some couples cohabitate for months and years prior to marriage.  Either way, the wedding night is more often a one-night getaway to a hotel.  Away from family, friends, and any wedding clean-up.  The newlyweds appoint members of the bridal party to transport gifts and wrap up wedding day details.

Ironically, the hopes of every newlywed couple is to retreat to their hotel room and get lost with wild romance and intimacy.  For a virgin bride, this is the night she becomes a real woman.  However, more often than not, newlyweds report back a quiet night.  They experience such total exhaustion from the wedding day that sleep was the only thing on their minds.  There is a cute article with several newlyweds relaying a summary of their wedding night on Huffingtonpost.com.

The Honeymoon Traveling

The honeymoon itself is still a get-away, an escape to another location.  Usually a distance away from home.  Some honeymoons can be quite exotic, traveling to islands surrounded by clear blue water.  Others are more reserved with a simple camp-out in the woods.  Honeymoons can be in one location or involve traveling to many locations.  Most honeymoons begin shortly following the wedding day or in the next few following days.  However, it is not uncommon for a newlywed couple to not plan an immediate honeymoon.  They celebrate a delayed honeymoon.  A year later gives them time to save money for a great trip.  Or ten years later as an anniversary celebration following a renewal of vows.

Now that we have covered the origins of several wedding rituals, it is time to decide which ones you will incorporate into your wedding.  How will you uphold the tradition?  What will you alter about the custom?  With that, may blessings and good fortune be upon all upcoming newlyweds.  Be sure to utilize the resources available here for wedding planning!

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